Ah, Black Friday. A day where innocent people get trampled over discounted iPads. The ultimate day that negates the entire spirit of the holiday the presents are meant for. Yes, Black Friday is upon us, and for some reason or another, all I can think of is Jingle All the Way.
You know Jingle All the Way. The 1996 family comedy that finally teamed up Arnold Schwarzenegger (who knew I could spell that without looking it up) and Sinbad as two fathers desperate to get their hands on the latest toy before Christmas. I want to say that I saw Jingle for the first time in school, which says a lot about the Western Pennsylvania school system. Even more shocking, I want to say I liked it? I think?
I think the most offensive thing is that Rita Wilson is Arnold's wife. I'm sorry, but that Austrian couldn't land. Mrs. Tom Hanks. She's above you, and she always will be.
I'm as shocked as you are, sir.
I don't think I've seen Jingle since that fateful day in whatever class I was in. All I remember is that Arny was trying to track down a Turbo Man for his son, and Sinbad was a mailman. Apparently, the USPS wasn't paying too much attention to their employees that year, because all Sinbad does is knock Arnold to the ground.
Here's the trailer:
Perhaps I liked Jingle because I was really into the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers in sixth grade, and I felt bad that my parents would go through a tiny bit of trouble like this to get me a toy. Or I was just a dumb kid. It should be noted that AMC in Pittsburgh is showing this movie this month in time for the holidays. Check out their Classic Movies page on Facebook for more details.
Either way, have a great Black Friday. And make sure you don't kill too many people.
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